heh.
short story LONG..
last Thursday marked about a week's worth of headache & ear pain along with some stuffiness & tenderness to touch on my face, but on wednesday, i noticed a bubble next to my oh so lovely *wisdom* tooth..
wisdom |ˈwizdəm|nounthe quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment; the quality of being wise.
(i dare say, i have *NO* idea why they're called "wisdom" teeth.. you're either WISE or DUMB for havin' 'em! O_o.. but NOT both)
seriously.
not feeling very wise for keeping the thing in my mouth for as long as i have, i went to the ER @ NYU school of dentistry *a combination of dentists & students aspiring to a career in dentistry*.
since i made myself a guinea pig, i was the source of LOTS of poking & prodding.. esp. of *said* bubble.
here's an excerpt of the convo goin' on over my mouth:
"wow, what's that.. oh sorry, did that hurt you?" about FIVE different times... with FIVE different STUDENTS..
OUCH. & yay. & *fun*
by the time i left the ER, my face was throbbing & i had a headache.
i was crying. i was annoyed. i was scheduled to have surgery the *next* thurs..
so i thought. lol
i arrived today only to discover that my appointment was scheduled for tomorrow.
aye yai yai..
they were gracious & had doctors available to take care of my *wisdom*.
how sweet..
i sit down & the *fun* really begins. there are 2 real doctors & 3 students.. all prepared to have a lil' science experiment in my mouth.
O_o
after a student is given the opportunity to give me drugs, she keeps putting the needle in the wrong spot.
*fun*
one doc says to the other doc, you'll hafta dissect it. i'm thinkin' "DISSECT WHAT"
but i'm a good guinea pig & i don't say a word..
all of a sudden, after about 5 or 6 needles of good ol' anesthesia, i hear a noise that sounds like a power saw.. WHAT THE WHAT??
for about 30 minutes.. they're sawing my friggin' tooth in two.
there's a conversation goin' on during dissection.. JUST LIKE in biology class..
"oh, no. i think i damaged the tissue!" "no, you didn't damage the tissue. keep on' SAWIN'!!"
or something like that..
i smelled smokin' toofes & swallowed blood often.
*MORE fun*
they were droppin' pieces of my tooth all over me, cuz *apparently* "aww mannn.. it KEEPS breakinggg!"
"keep on SAWIN'!"
and "aww mann.. where's that scalpel, oh yea.. check the patient's lap. we keep droppin' instruments on her..."
i'm gruntin', gaggin' & moanin'..
they keep apologizin' & telling' me *almost done* for 1 hour + (smart group)
in my mind i'm havin serious struggles. i just wanna get up & run with my bloody broken pieces of tooth left danglin' in my mouth. but i know i can't.
cuz that WOULDN'T be attractive when i laugh.
they cut my lip. *sorry* they bang my teeth. *sorry* they saw a lil' more cuz that's *FUNN*
then finally, the tooth is out.
"stitch her up! but make sure as you stitch, you push on the open wound with all of your might!!"
yay!
i get up. get out before they decide to do more sawing & head home.
sO, "WHY in the world is this a *thankful* thursday post," you ask?
cuz i'm *thankful* that it's over. i've learned a VALUABLE lesson in the wisdom of wisdom teeth.
(let the professionals do it. at least they don't talk to their friends step-by-step about how they're jackin' up yO mouf.)
a lil' pic to go with this loverly story..
nothin' like the birdie of wisdom to teach a lil' lesson to guinea pigs.. |
'cuz don't worry.. one day we'll all look back on this day & laugh.
ha. ha.
i'm thankful. ;)
4 comments:
Oh my goodness!! How funny was this!! Love your writing style!! Is so funny and keeps you entertained until the end... I laughed a LOT. Thank you thank you for sharing my talented friend!!You should write a children's book or series!! I'm serious!
BTW...Keep putting the link on FB..helps me to just click and read!!
UGH! I'm so sorry!!! How old were these students??!! 8?!?! Geez!
I had a tooth taken out 5 years ago so I know what this experience is like and how scary it is! Except I did mine with a professional in Mexico. It took 15 mins and cost $20. He even threw in a teeth cleaning.
impressive, Clarissa!! can u pay for my airfare to Mexico? i still have one more to remove.. lol..
& thnx Vee for the compliments! i'm encouraged! ^.^
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