thankful thursday!!! with update*

i'm officially a goober.

i knew this already. but now i REALLY know it.

lemme ask YOU a question..

have you EVER mistaken somebody for dead??

O___o

wait.. lemme ask you again.. cuz you probably think i'm playin'... 

have you EVER mistaken somebody for dead??

o___O

well, i did..
yesterday, actually. lol

*no joke*

mind you, this is NOT sumthin i'm proud of. it just kinda happened..  & i felt like such an idiot for it.. that's probably what i am.

not a goober. an idiot. yea, that's it. o_O

my friend has been sick for a very LOOOONGG time. & the other day she posted a fb note via someone else. apparently cuz she's gotten just that sick. at the end of the note, her signature was "i'll see you on the other side.."

well.. the note IS circulating as if it's an obituary..

whatever. i'm not gonna keep goin' on this one.

i think this blog is my *venting* post right now..

shame on me.

she ain't dead. (at least i don't think she is..)

anyway, this WHOLE fiasco of an ordeal got me thinkin'..

WOW.. life is SHORT. first Steve Jobs & now an old friend from grade school (who's not dead, but sick)

people need to act like they KNOW.

am i doin' what i'm supposed to be doin'? am i being SALT & LIGHT (Matthew 5:13, 14)
am i living the way i should?
...

i'm a work in progress if i've ever seen one. i screw up EVERYday. but my life belong's to Jesus Christ.

i don't EVER wanna belittle my allegiance to the ONE who died for me.

better yet, HIS allegiance to me.

& yet, i see in myself, just as Peter & EVERY other believer does, this battle with my ugly self.

to try to get my way..

but then i remember that this life is not MINE. & i give it back to Him. cuz really,

nothin' else matters.

i'd be a fool to return to the vomit of an existence i used to know.. i've put myself in some predicaments that i shouldn't have only to get what *i* wanted.

pretty much sucks.

i was reading in Genesis tonight about when Cain was given the boot (you know... out  of his home). never to return to the sweet family life he once knew.. (the garden was already jacked up, but at least he had two parents that loved him, right?)

anyway.

he moved to NOD. that word means vagrancy. & vagrancy basically means "wanderin' without purpose"

i'm sorry, but i've been to NOD. 

BORING.

makes ya nod. lol..

& i'm done. i got better things to do. like LIVE.

kinda like my friend from grade school.. the girl ain't dead yet.. & neither am i. she attempted to share a lil' encouragement about her suffering & the Lord.

i *think* this is what this is 'spoze to be. (an encouragement) heh heh..

like Dory said in Finding Nemo.. *just keep swimming, just keep swimming..*

great advice from a lil' blue fishie. (i'm takin' it..)

& i'm *thankful*

UPDATE** my friend died three days after my big oops..

life is short. Jesus Christ is STILL the ONLY answer.